Angus and I were watching Antiques Roadshow on TV last night. We enjoy hearing about the objects that people bring along and are often in awe of what some of these things are worth.
Billy Connolly spoke once of the kind of person that Angus and I witnessed on TV last on Antiques Roadshow. He refers to them as Boffins - "people who bore the crap out of others as they are fascinated by and know an incredible amount about some boring thing that no one else gives a shit about!" A Boffin. Billy reckons that these people are often told to "f**k off", a phrase that he thinks should always be on everyone's lip anyway, just waiting to be served.
Anyway, Angus and I have never met a Boffin and hope we never do. There was a man who was talking to one of the Antique experts, he produced a little box with a clear lid. Inside he had two old train tickets, they dated back to the 1800's. Angus and I listened as this guy explained, "waffle waffle, blah blah" and then he said "Two tickets for dogs". What? "I collect train tickets for dogs and I've been collecting them for years. Oh my good god! "And I have a matching pair here"
This guy only collects old train tickets for dogs! This is what I mean, a boring thing that no one cares or really wants to know about. I didn't know that a dog required a train ticket back in the 1800's, so I guess I learnt something there. The expert was very polite, but I have to wonder, did he quietly think "We've got a right one here". Train tickets for dogs collector, just when I thought I'd seen it all. Dear lord!
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