Valuing what is important

I am starting to question lately what is really important in life? I am wondering where Angus and my life is heading and where we see ourselves in the future. I know wherever we end up, it's together. There is a part of me deep inside that is yearning for some simplicity and a slower pace of life.

I am growing increasingly disillusioned with urban life and the pace that it operates at. A lot of people's values seem focused on grabbing what they can in a monetary sense. Ok, I know money makes the world go round and life is pretty crap when you don't have enough of it. I believe if you are happy, content and have enough money for your essentials; plus a bit left over for extras, then shouldn't life be complete.

We am saving for a that rainy day, retirement fund is in place and ticking along and our bills get paid. I feel Angus and I do our bit and we are happy.

What is this Law of Attraction thing? What has happened to working for what you want and making plans? The Law of Attraction - put out the happy, positive vibe and it all falls in your lap. Hey, each to your own and people can believe what they want. But, I just can't buy into it. I've read a few books on the Law of Attraction and I'm not convinced.

There is strong part of Angus and I that wants to leave the urban rat-race and escape to the quiet rural life. It will take plotting and planning, and hard work. But isn't that the the way it works, what you put in, you get back.

Baby kiwi survives Northland drought | infonews.co.nz New Zealand's local news community

Baby kiwi survives Northland drought | infonews.co.nz New Zealand's local news community

Why can't we focus on saving these little guys?

Look at this little guy. They just look like the most innocent, harmless creatures to me. Kiwis, sooo cute! I watched a current affairs segment on Campbell Live last night about the plight of the Northern Kiwi, so sad.

There has been a drought in the northern most part of the North Island. The wee Kiwis are suffering. Baked, dry ground means no earthworms. This the kiwis favourite snack and a major part of their diet. The little kiwi is starving. Many are dying.

Thankfully there are kind conservation people up there who are helping these wee guys. I thought great, but what about the rest of New Zealanders and our government? Here they are focussing on global warming, reducing nuclear weapons, mining of the minerals, what about our National Icon. The Kiwi?

If we lose our National bird, we lose some of what gives this country our identity in the world. I'm going to see if there is a donation I can make to help these wee guys. Big Kiwis, let's help the little kiwis huh?

Brainfarts......... Doh!

Yesterday morning I woke up and had a brainwave about a topic for a blog. I lay in bed thinking about what I'd write, you know, planning it out. I got up as usual, helped my partner Angus off to work, made coffee, sat and watched the breakfast news. My morning routine.

Later on, I sat down at this laptop, and prepared myself to start writing my latest blog entry. I had been quite impressed with myself, two blogs in two days, I'm not a regular blogger. It is nice though when I get a hit of inspiration. Do you think I could remember the topic I had been thinking about in bed that morning? No..... Great!, I thought. Today's blog is about er....... I haven't got a bloody clue! At least I got something written yesterday, on a completely different tangent and topic, but I was proud of my effort.

In many readings and comments from fellow MSers (those of us in the MS club), the term Brainfart is used put a light-hearted spin on the cognitive problems us MSers experience. I have two scars on either side of the front of my brain. I remember sitting in my neurologists office well over 5 years ago looking at the results of my MRI scan and thinking, geez those are large parts of my brain. As with most things related to this disease, no one knows what causes it or any symptoms that go with it.

Brainfarts. Most people giggle when they hear me say that, but when you actually experience them, it is just damn frustrating! Seriously, it is like thoughts of what you are going to do or say just go poot! Like a little fart out your ear. Gone forever. They may return suddenly, usually too late. I can be sitting watching TV and suddenly look at Angus and make a completely out of context statement as the lost thought from hours ago has returned. Sometimes the thoughts just don't return.

I can forget something I was going to do walking across the kitchen from the bench to the fridge or pantry. Ask me what I was doing around this time 2 years ago and I could probably tell you. I have to wonder if those two scars have killed some of the short term memory or there's a shortage is the circuits somewhere.

It's like the visit to the neurologists office, I can remember that very vividly, long-term memory is working fine. The short-term, lost in mere minutes thoughts that allow me to function with everyday things, are the hardest thing to cope with MS. Memories from 5 years+ are no good to me, yes, I have some very pleasent memories from past events, but I would prefer to function better with the day to day stuff.

I haven't had a vent about MS in my blog yet. I had no intention of doing so this morning, but like much of my writing in my blog, the content just flows and I don't give a lot of thought to what I write as I am doing it.

I was talking about brainfarts with Angus last night and after forgetting something I was going to do in seconds again,I said "I think I'm getting worse!" Negative I know, but I get cross and frustrated with myself. He looked at me with those gentle grey eyes, full of love and made it all ok. "We both are babe" Bless him!

Deep Tissue Massage...... should I have fought back?

I am a habitual sloucher when sitting in one of the chairs in the lounge. In fact, my posture is crap full stop. I still remember my dad asking why I was sitting on my back when I was a teenager. Did I sit up straight? No. Typical teenager. "Yeah, yeah, dad lecturing me again".

I bought a Swiss ball last week to see if that would help me to sit up straight. It does work, I sit straight. But it doesn't alleviate the constant dull ache in my lower back. I am regreting the amount of slouching I have done believe me. "You were right Dad".

On Monday I went the Westfield Shopping Centre to get a massage. There is a small screened area in the middle of the mall where 3-4 very nice, respectful Chinese guys give you "the treatment". They know how to inflict, oops, I mean administer a deep tissue massage. I lay on the table and he went to work. Geez, did that man find some spots. I came away afterwards feeling somewhat beaten up, but with the ache eased quite considerably.

Today there is still an ache, its two days later, but I am wondering if it's just the deep bruising that lasts for a few days in the muscles after deep tissue massage.

Angus and I have been talking about how we should try having date night. We've been together 5 and 1/2 years, we need to focus on us more. I am going to suggest that the first date night takes place this Friday at a thermal hot pool not far from home. Romantic soak in a thermal hot pool - too soak away my creaks and groans!